Laughter is the Best Medicine

 

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Sometimes there are advantages to being short.

Click on the above image for the best ever SNL skit

A barber's car?

"Never mind, I'll do it myself."

Beer - p #0

Biggus Dickus

 

They Said THIS In the Church Bulletin?

 

Heavens to Betsy! When you're spreading God's word, it's important to pay attention to commas and spelling and proper phrasing. If you don't, you may end up saying something other than what you really intended. And sometimes the result can be scandalous--or just funny as all get out. The following are excerpts from church bulletins nationwide.

Preach it!

--The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks On the Water." The sermon tonight: "Searching For Jesus."

--At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

Suffer the little children

--Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 p.m. in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

--For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

--Sunday School: Children will be led in sinning and Bible study.

The Power of Prayer

--Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

--Don't let worry kill you. Let the church help.

--Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

After the worship service...

--This evening at 7 p.m. there will be a hymn sing in the park across from the church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

--Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

Ladies, Ladies

--The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

--Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands.

 --Ladies' Bible Study will be held Thursday at 10 a.m. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.

--The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

Which Door Do I Use?

--The Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 p.m. Please use the back door.

--Weight Watchers will meet at 7 p.m. at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

No Good Deed Will Go Unpunished

--Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

--Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

How Much Money Should I Give?

--The associate minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours."

Training Your Adopted Dog

Life Explained

On the first day, God created the dog and said:

'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.'

The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?'

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said:

'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.'

The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?'

And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said:

'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.'

The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?'

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said:

'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years.'

But the human said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?'

'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'

So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family.. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren... And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone..

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information.. I'm doing it as a public service.

Tallywhacker Bush Bats and the Doo Doo Eating Dog

by Tony Isaacs

One weekend about 20 or so years ago, (my God, has it been that long?) my cousin Jeff and I loaded up his son Jason, aged ten, and my son Sean aged eight, along with Jeff's black Rotweiler named Sam and off we went to four-wheel it through the marshy bottoms to camp out on Jeff's 43 acres of land that lies on both sides of the South Sulphur River. A few years later we built a cabin, but in those days our campsite consisted pretty much of tents, tarps and a wooden electrical cable spool that we used as a table

For the rest of this article, click here

Don't Miss our New Humorous Feature "The Car Wash Thief" (that story is really one for the birds)

An unforeseen result of deforestation?

 

Don't forget to bring a paddle.

Expectant Father?

I don't think these will ever go over very well with men (they would NOT want company and would never lift and lower the seat). Women on the other hand . . .

Backgrounds Matter!

 

The Gaseous Preacher

 

The Toot Tone Tuner

More Funny Videos

Secret Agent Dog

There's a dog who lives a life of danger - in his master's kitchen.

The Classic Trunk Monkey Videos

The Original  |  The Offer  |  The Eggs  |  The Bridge

How cheap coconut tanning oil and a swarm of angry bees turned a family vacation upside down.

by Tony Isaacs

Have you ever been to Destin, Florida? I love the white sand beaches, moderate climate and beautiful clear blue ocean there, although it's a much more touristy kind of place than it was about 30 years ago when I first went there with my father, step mother, half-sister, and other family members. I remember that we checked into this one and a half star motel right on the beach, next door to a new circular tower motel which had a revolving restaurant on the top. The motion made my step-mother nauseous - which proved to be a minor irritation compared to what was to come.

For the rest of this rib-rocking, hilarious and mostly true story, click HERE.

Did Dinosaurs Cause Their Own Ex-stink-shun?

Many people have theorized that flatulence from cows, and the resultant methane, is a contributor to global warming.  Which made me think about all the billions of dinosaurs which once existed and the relative size difference between dinosaurs and cows.  Do you suppose they might have had contests, the way some modern day Neanderthals do?

 

For More Funny Billboards and Signs Click Here!

The Best Colloidal Silver on the Planet!

More Humor:

They Said THIS In the Church Bulletin?

Take Me Back - A humorous and nostalgic look at days gone by

Children and Grandchildren - The mixed blessings of parenthood

What to Eat When All Your Food is Poisoned (humorous visual message)

And God Created - A humorous look at Creation and Nutrition

My First Trip to Destin, Florida

Tallywhacker Bushbats and the Doo Doo Eating Dog

The Revenge of the Jalapeño Toilet Paper

The Great Wind Point Fireworks Escapade

The Car Wash Thief

Click HERE for Part One of our Humor Collection.

Check out our newly updated and growing catalog!

The TBYIL Supplement & Health Catalog

The very best hand-picked natural supplements, health products and companies.

Proud Members of

The National Health Federation

The American Botanical Council

intraMAX

intraMAX™

100% Organic MicroComplexed™ IntraCELL™ Level IV Technology ~ 415 Nutrients All-In-One, Perfect Whole Foods & Phyto Nutrition ~ Super Energizing ~ All Natural DefenseThe Most Scientifically Advanced, Clinically Proven, Health Promoting Organic Nutritional Supplement Available Today!

Alpha Lipoic Acid

Essential for increasing and maintaining glutathione levels

Available Now!
Click on the image for more information

The plant you need to make your own home remedy for cancer, hepatitis-C & more may be growing in your back yard!  Read all about this proven  remedy plus much more on how to naturally beat illness and live a longer, healthier and happier life.

Nature's Logic Pet Food

The VERY BEST pet food available anywhere. Highly endorsed and utilized by The Best Years in Life. 100% nutrient dense, highly digestible, protein rich pet food derived only from natural ingredients and whole foods including beef, chicken, duck, lamb, fish, venison & rabbit.

Berkey water filter

Membrane Complex

Membrane Complex is one of Dr. Hans Nieper's formulas containing magnesium, calcium and potassium that supports the following systems:

Cardiovascular, Lymphatic, Epthelial (skin), Digestive, Hormonal, Immune, Muscular, Nervous, Renal, Respiratory, Sensory and Skeletal.

SenTraMin 75 Powdered Plant Derived Mineral Capsules

Rockland's world famous plant derived minerals are now available in vegetable capsules. Each capsule contains 400 milligrams of approximately 75 minerals in their concentrated powdered form.

Sutherlandia OPC

The ultimate immune booster and modulator from South Africa

NAC SUSTAIN

NAC SUSTAIN is in a bilayer Quick Release / Sustained Release format of N-ACETYL-L-CYSTEINE (NAC), a powerful antioxidant amino acid and a precursor to the critical antioxidant glutathione.

Glutathione is important for DNA repair and exerts a variety of protective effects, including detoxification and intracellular defense against oxidative stress.

An essential complimentary supplement for use with Sutherlandia OPC or Rose Laurel OPC Plus.

 

 

intraKID

intraKID is the deluxe and most all-inclusive liquid nutritional supplement available for children.

RM-10 Mushroom Immune Defense

Garden of Life's proprietary blend of 10 mushrooms , plus Cat's Claw and Poten_zyme selenium. Use referral code XOT949  for $5 off your first order.

Garden of Life Primal Defense

A natural blend of 12 species of probiotics and Homeostatic Soil Organisms (HSOs).  Use referral code XOT949  for $5 off your first order from iHerb.

Blood Support

Based on the formulas of master herbalists which have been successful in cleansing the blood and liver, boosting the immune system and fighting cancer.

  

The Best Colloidal Silver
on the Planet

Contains about 20 ppm of .9999 pure silver in de-ionized water.  Silver inhibits the growth of one-celled organisms, (such as bacteria and viruses) by deactivating the organism's oxygen metabolism enzymes. In turn, this destroys its' cell membranes, stopping the replication of its' DNA.

The Krill Miracle™

The Krill Miracle™

Concentrated Omega 3, 6 & 9, Many Times More Powerful than Fish Oil.

Utopia 
												Naturals Dr. Ken's MiracleTransdermal Magnesium 
												Oil

Utopia Naturals Dr. Ken's MiracleTransdermal Magnesium Oil

Cell Forte Max3

Triple-strength Cell Fort? MAX3 features an exclusive combination essential for regulating healthy cell development and delivering life-changing results. Cell Fort? dramatically increases natural killer-cell activity and boosts the cells' defenses. Maitake has been shown  to nutritionally support the growth of healthy cells. Cat's claw is clinically studied to benefit both the natural and acquired immune systems, plus enhance critical B- and T-cell effectiveness.

Drenamin

Superior support for the critical adrenal glands.

Berkey water filter

Outstanding whole food nutrients for healthy adrenal function and supporting the body during times of stress.  Contains vitamins, minerals, amino acids and more.

 

Olive Leaf Extract?

Olive Leaf Extract

Powerful Support Against Symptoms of Viruses and Bacterias

Chromium GTF

GTF Chromium is a complex known as Glucose Tolerance Factor and is made by fermenting nutritional yeast (Saccharomyces cerevisiae) with chromium. GTF Chromium facilitates the transport of glucose into cells by insulin.*

 

Statue-tory Rape?

ClearLungs

ClearLungs supports clear lungs and free breathing by supporting normal metabolic function, fluid balance, and normal tissue repair.

Nebulizer Kit

Lobelia

Dr. Christopher considered Lobelia to be one of the greatest herbs in the world, and he used in over 20 of his herbal formulas.

Use with nebulizer to help improve breathing and lung function.

Mullein Tincture

Mullein is both anti-spasmodiic and anti-inflammatory.  Wonderful for lung and congestion issues when used in a nebulizer, especially in combination with colloidal silver and lobelia extract.

Calcium Bentonite Clay

Internal use helps to cleanse the body’s cells and colon by pulling toxins out and eliminating them via the colon, kidneys and liver. Typical use for an adult is 1-2 teaspoons per day in a 6-8 oz. glass of water.

External use deep cleanses skin pores, removing dirt and impurities, lifting out poisons and toxins stored in the epidermis; pimples and blackheads are absorbed into the clay bed, resulting in accelerated healing and nourishment of the skin. The skin is clean, refreshed, and alive. You can see and feel the difference. Continued use results in a more beautiful, healthy skin. Healing Clay is 100% Natural. No additives. No fragrances. No Animal Products. (Note: Initial use may result in a temporary increase of blemishes as toxins are pulled from the epidermal layers.)

Diatomaceous Earth

Diatomaceous earth is a natural dewormer/parasite eliminator as well at a detoxer of heavy metals, bacteria and viruses. It promotes healthy skin,hair, and nails, is a digestive aid and colon cleanser, helps lower bad cholesterol, regulates blood pressure and aids in relieving sore joints.

B-12 / Folic Acid Combo

Zeolite Minerals

Zeolites are naturally occurring volcanic mineral compounds with a negative magnetic charge and a unique crystalline cage-like structure which draws in many harmful toxins.

Liquid Joint Care

Formulated specifically to provide support for healthy ligament, tendon and joint function. Contains combination of Glucosamine, Chondroitin, MSM, Collagen and a comfort support blend of Turmeric & Bromelain.

Advanced Colloidal Gold

Eases Joint Pain. Boosts memory, mood and focus!

 

SenTraMin 75 Powdered Plant Derived Mineral Capsules

Rockland's world famous plant derived minerals are now available in vegetable capsules. Each capsule contains 400 milligrams of approximately 75 minerals in their concentrated powdered form.

A Few Cartoons for the Road

 

 

 

 

Chromium GTF

Trace mineral essential to the metabolism of glusose, sugars, starches, and carbohydrates. Supports the cardiovascular, lymphatic, epthelial (skin), hormonal, and muscular systems and is essential for proper insulin utilization.

Mega Digestive Enzymes with Pancreatin 10X

Enzyme Protocols may reduce arterial plaque, reduce scarring and relieve sore muscles and stiff joints.

The Silver Bullet Colloidal Generator

Rose Laurel OPC Plus

Nerium Oleander Pure Concentrate (OPC) Extract is an herbal supplement in a capsule form. Supports the immune system, healing properties that detoxify the body at the cellular level, enhance energy and increase stamina, aids in maintaining good health and induces abnormal cell elimination.

Nerium OPC Intensive Skin Cream

Look years younger and heal and eliminate all kinds of skin problems. Nerium OPC Skin Therapy Creme is simply amazing for all kinds of skin problems! An “anti-aging” and “skin rejuvenating” skin therapy crème for wrinkles, age/liver spots on the face, neck, and hands, as well as dry crusty patches of epidermal cells in a state of disordered morphology, dysplasia, benign neoplasia, or in situ neoplasm.

Soothing Healing Silver Aloe Gel

MORE POWERFUL & IMPROVED! All-Natural soothing Silver Aloe Gel 2 oz or 4 oz made with Colloidal Silver and 15X Organic Aloe Vera Concentrate with Texas Juniper Essential Oil. This new and advanced product provides the germ killing power of Colloidal Silver, the healing properties of Organic Aloe Vera, the antibacterial properties of Texas Juniper Oil and Orange Oil. 

Gold Aloe Gel

Gold Aloe Gel is a healing gel made from 15x Aloe Vera and 50 ppm Colloidal Gold and is used as a healing agent for epidermal tissue that is wrinkled and sunburned, as well as for wounds, cuts, and abrasions and otherwise damaged tissue.

 Berkey Water Filters

If you would like to donate to help us keep this web site active and growing, click on the button above.   Much thanks! - Tony & Luella

 

Your website hosts Tony and Luella May Isaacs

Listen to us every Wednesday evening on The Best Years in Life Radio Show

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Misty*, My Buddy, Little Rascal & Lady the "found dogs" - Official Mascots of The Best Years in Life

*Rest in peace sweet girl - almost 17 years of wonderful memories.

Tony Isaacs and Luella May are natural health writers featured at:

   

   

   

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The Best Years in Life
P O Box 121 Cooper TX  75432  Phone: 903-886-2436  Fax: 801-926-4273  Email: Dquixote1217[at]gmail.com- (replace [at] with @)

Disclaimer: The information on this page and on this website has not been evaluated by the FDA.  We do not diagnose, treat, cure or prevent illness or disease - instead, we try to help people learn how to do so themselves.  Anyone who believes they have a serious medical condition or health issue should seek diagnoses from a qualified medical professional before making any decisions on how to best address their health. We do not sell or advocate drugs, nor do we make any claims that anything advocated or sold on this website is a drug.  Furthermore, anyone contemplating using any products or information on this website must accept such use as experimental and voluntary.  No claims are made regarding the therapeutic use of the products or information on this website and all products featured or sold on this website must be considered nutritional supplements only.